Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Saliva Chicken?

On NPR yesterday when I was just thinking that all media outlets needed to be taken out and shot there was a piece about correcting odd Chinese menu translations.  Husband and Wife lung slice, for example.  I'm not sure what they are going to do about that one, but Saliva Chicken was obviously supposed to be mouth watering chicken.  I'm pretty sure I would not order saliva chicken, [Buck agrees] and it does seem that between google translations and a mutual misunderstanding of foreign idiom, we are bound to order something nasty or possibly be pleasantly surprised.  Another argument against being presented with "that foreign muck" as a friend once put it.
Well.
A more local cuisine seems to have been Buck's comb, and I'm wondering if I'm going to just have to set the alarm and get up early enough to let Buck get away from hens with grievances.
This morning, they were all on the porch, the door blew shut and even my lethargy was moved by the sounds of chickens in a panic.
Before 9:00 AM Buck had already been twice thwarted in his goal of removing a piece of me so you will understand my reluctance to be on a closed in porch with frantic chickens, but I am a big girl and they are a fraction of my height and weight and I have a broom and raisins for distractions and diversions.
I got past them and opened the door letting them out before I noticed that Buck's head was covered with blood.
Went back, got a towel, engaged in some matadorial maneuvers with Buck until he had the towel firmly in his beak.  Before he could take off with it, I dropped it over his head and picked him up.  It always surprises me how docile and charming he is when he knows that resistance is futile.  I put him in the tub and cleaned off the blood with a warm washcloth, put some of my daughter's magic healing herbal balm [contact me for her contact info] and let him loose into his flock of disgruntled hens.
He is so intent and serious about his job, so careful to keep track of his ladies and to chivvy them out of their hideouts, keeping them together and safe. He makes sure everyone is in at night [probably why he resents the beak check.  Probably thinks it's an insinuendo about his competence] and waiting until all the hens are out of the coop in the morning before he starts nailing them.  What are they upset about?  Maybe I should spray his exterior with some nasty tasting substance like Brut.  

1 comment:

  1. A great post and a realy delightful site. I hope Buck's head heals quickly. I hope you post some of your art.

    ReplyDelete

Glad to hear from you, but criticisms will be ignored. It's the beauty of the web. I will answer all friendly remarks. Buck handles the rest.